16 Feb
Hard Things Feel Hard Because They Are Hard [TFLP296]
The start of 2026 has been genuinely hard. Sarah’s father-in-law passed away at the end of last year, which meant travel, grief, and being present for her husband’s family. Then came a brutal bout of flu B in January, the kind that knocked a lot of people flat this winter. Then her kids got sick. Then more family travel. Then a snowstorm. Then more sick kids. And underneath all of it, the broader weight of what’s happening in the United States right now. The ongoing atrocities, the things that are difficult to watch and impossible to ignore.
Facing Hard Things Doesn’t Mean You’re Doing It Wrong
One of the things Sarah keeps coming back to, for herself and for the people she works with, is that facing something difficult feels hard because it is hard. Not because you’re missing some productivity hack or life optimization strategy. Not because you haven’t found the right framework yet.
This is something lawyers in particular tend to struggle with. There’s a deeply ingrained belief in legal culture that the right combination of effort, intelligence, and strategy can smooth out almost any problem. That if something still feels painful or overwhelming, you must be approaching it wrong. Sarah pushes back on that directly. Some things are just very difficult. That’s true of grief. It’s true of illness and exhaustion. It’s true of watching your country do things that feel unconscionable. And it’s true of the process of leaving law, which is rarely as clean or linear as people hope it will be. None of that difficulty means it isn’t worth doing. It just means it’s hard.
What Former Lawyer Stands For
Sarah also used this moment to be clear about something she thinks matters. Former Lawyer is anti-fascist. She acknowledges that this shouldn’t need to be said, but it does.
For anyone who has worked with Sarah, is considering it, or is thinking about joining the Former Lawyer Collaborative, she wants you to know where the money goes. Every month, 10% of Former Lawyer’s revenue goes to the Equal Justice Initiative. Another 10% goes to the ACLU. In February, Sarah also donated 10% of January’s gross revenue to the Immigrant Law Center of Minnesota.
She’s not sharing this to take a bow. She’s sharing it because she believes what someone does with their money reflects their values, and she wants the people in her community to know what hers are. If you’re going to invest in working with someone, it’s worth knowing what they’re invested in.
Being Compassionate With Yourself Right Now
If 2026 has already knocked you around, you’re not alone. Sarah is in it too. And one of the things she keeps returning to is that compassion for yourself isn’t a luxury or a soft skill. It’s actually what makes it possible to show up for other people and for the things that matter.
For lawyers who are unhappy and trying to figure out what comes next, that compassion is especially important. The process of leaving law is already hard enough without adding self-criticism for finding it hard. If you’re in that place right now, the First Steps to Leaving the Law a good place to start. And if you’re ready for more support, theFormer Lawyer Collaborative is there when you are.
Hi, and welcome to The Former Lawyer Podcast. I'm your host, Sarah Cottrell. I practiced law for 10 years and now I help unhappy lawyers ditch their soul-sucking jobs. On this show, I share advice and strategies for aspiring former lawyers, and interviews with former lawyers who have left the law behind to find careers and lives that they love.
Hello, lovely podcast listeners. So I don’t know if you have noticed, but this is the first episode of the podcast that I have recorded in 2026. So if you’re listening to this podcast on the day it drops, it’s dropping on February 16th.
The last couple of weeks, I have been rerunning episodes of the podcast that were popular or that I thought people should listen to. The reason for that is that 2026 is kicking my ass, as I know it is for many of you. If you’re on my email list, you’ve already heard some of this, so it’ll be a bit of a retread.
But I just wanted to record this episode for the podcast because of everything in 2026. So, top line, if 2026 is kicking your ass, you’re not alone. You are not alone. I am with you 100%.
My father-in-law passed away at the end of last year. So we were traveling to be with my husband’s family and to remember him and to mourn him. Then we got back from that trip in the beginning of January, and I got a particularly virulent strain of flu B, which I know lots of people also had a similar flu experience in January.
Then, of course, as happens if you are a parent with kids, one of my kids got the flu. Then my husband was traveling again to help with family stuff. Then, of course, as many of you know, there was a snowmageddon situation in much of the U.S. Fortunately, where we are, which is outside of Philadelphia, was not hit too terribly hard, but it still happened. Then there were multiple barfing kids in my house.
Anyway. And then, of course, on top of all that, that doesn’t even touch on the madness and the horrors that are occurring on a broader scale here in the U.S., right? Just atrocity after atrocity, everything that we’re seeing in Minnesota and elsewhere.
One of the things that I said to the people who are on my email list is that I keep having to remind myself that facing this and fighting it feels hard because it is hard, not because I’m doing anything wrong. That might be something that you need to hear too, because I think a lot of us who become lawyers think that there is some perfect combination of life hacks that would make going through hard things not feel as hard as they are.
The reality is that there are many things that are just very difficult. That doesn’t mean that they’re not worth doing. It doesn’t mean that it’s not worth fighting.
All of that to say, that is why the first few episodes of the year, which I recorded back in November, released. Then there were some reruns. Now here we are again with new podcast episodes.
I also wanted to take this opportunity just to remind you that the Former Lawyer podcast, Former Lawyer, is anti-fascist. Again, should not really be something that I have to say, but I do because, you know.
Also, for those of you who have worked with me or are interested in working with me in the future, have thought about joining the Collab, I want you to know that one of the things that I do with the money that I receive in Former Lawyer is that every month, 10% of my growth, so 10% of whatever amount I receive, goes directly to the Equal Justice Initiative. I’m sure many of you are familiar with that. We’ll link it in the show notes if you are not.
Another 10% goes to the ACLU. In addition, this month in February, I also donated 10% of Former Lawyer’s gross in January to the Immigrant Law Center of Minnesota.
I tell you these things not to be like, “Look at me, I’m donating money. I’m so great.” No, not at all. But I do think that what someone does with their money tells you a lot about what their values are. It’s important to me that you who are listening know what my values are and what the values of Former Lawyer are and where your money’s going if you’re someone who ultimately decides that you want to work with me or that you want to be part of the Collab.
So 2026 has been rough, and I feel really lucky that I get to share this podcast with you and to provide, hopefully, some hope, both in your individual professional circumstances, but also just a reminder that being human is good and caring about humans is also good. We need to learn how to be compassionate with ourselves so that we can also extend that compassion to other people.
And P.S. Go to therapy. Just going to add that in there. If you’re someone who’s new to the podcast, that is advice that I will probably share almost every week.
Thank you so much for being here. I don’t have good words to sign off, but just know that I am thinking of all of you who listen. I’m so glad that you spent a little bit of time with me today. Thanks so much for listening. I’ll talk to you next week.
Thanks so much for listening. I absolutely love getting to share this podcast with you. If you haven't yet, I invite you to download my free guide: First Steps to Leaving the Law at formerlawyer.com/first. Until next time, have a great week.
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